I came first in Philippines and moved to Canada.

I am in St. Martin School and I wanna have some good friends and I don`t want to get hurt!

One time I added one friend from my school so that started the fight!
She said I will show you my tattoo from my tongue tomorrow at school

and I asked her `so where is your tattoo in your tongue`
I`m gonna show you after school and I see her again after school and ask it again she says `I think tomorrow I can show you`

and I said to her your a liar you don`t even have a tattoo on your tongue!

and she said okay I`m a liar so you don`t believe me and I started blocking her and I reported her to Facebook because I just Written a Comment on Facebook and she said Who invited you to our party!

so that`s it!

There is a certain emotion that is completely unexplainable. Its a mixture of embarrassment, shame, and helplessness. I never knew the impact of words until they eventually hit me. It is incredible how people can careless about things that could effect you so much. I was in eighth grade and I didn't have a lot of friends but I wasn't alone either, just average. I thought I was invisible to most people, like a filler person. I didn't mind that. I don't like attention, never have, I don't know how to handle people in social situations. Well it turns out I was noticed more than I thought, and it scared me so bad. There were times when I could hear people talk about me and laugh about me while I walk just a few feet infront of them. It made my mind wonder, what they were talking about, or if I was just coincidence that my name would be mentioned just previous to laughter. These behind the curtain talks continued for most of the year, until the curtains began to open. There was a girl who was of a higher social rank than me, and I had never even talked to her. One day she and this boy were walking down the hall just infront of me, and they noticed I was just a bit behind them. She turned around and walked up to me. I didn't know what to do, it was so unexpected that I be approached. She looked at me with this horrible smile, and said that I was ugly and that it would be better if I didn't show up to school anymore. I was also on the track team this year and it was hard to watch the whole team go to "team dinners" and " girls night" but somehow always forget to invite just me. I began to believe all the things people had made up about me, their rumors had taken over my mind. I had a lot of problems for a long time, and it wasn't until I saw past my insecurities and into others that I realized we are all the same. I saw girls worried about the same things I was. The similarities between me and these seemingly perfect and popular girls were so much that I eventually saw them as no different than myself, and that is how I gained my confidence back and reversed what had happened before.

The group of girls came up to me -- I recognized them immediately as the pretty and popular ones.  And then one split off and came forwards.  She was smirking at me, trying to contain her laughter, while the others giggled behind her.

"Hey, Jesse -- Wanna go out with me?"

Nervously, I said, "Umm, sure?"

Then she could contain herself no longer.  She blurted out, "OH MY GOD!  HE BELIEVED ME!"

She turned to face the other girls, who had erupted into fits of laughter.

Then she turned back to me, grinning meanly.

"Do you honestly think there is any way I would go out with YOU?"

And then I felt the shame slide over me like icy water, stealing my exuberance, my vitality, my sense of worth and pride.

I wanted to disappear from the planet -- to drop into a hole in the ground and never come back.

This was what 6th, 7th, 8th, and some of 9th grade were like for me.

I was called out "to fight" by the popular kids almost every day, asked out as a joke, and ostracized for no other reason than because I showed it when people hurt me -- I couldn't hide my shame, and that made me a target.

The other kids could smell fear on me, and they took advantage of it whenever possible.

Why?  Because although they were just as terrified as I was, they'd learned that it was safer to hide behind a "bully" mask and pro-actively strike others than it was to be peaceful and risk becoming targets themselves.  They'd learned that they could direct focus away from themselves by bullying someone else and making THEM the center of attention.  Perhaps more than anything, they'd learned that they could make themselves feel superior to others, if they could see on someone else's face that THEY believed it was true -- that they'd actually managed to convince someone that they were on a different "level" from everyone else.  Just seeing that expression of shame on another person's face reinforced the mythology that their entire self-esteem depended on: The idea that some people"belonged", and other's didn't.  That they were "somebody" in a world where some people were simply "nobodies".  And the more people around them they could get to buy into this distorted worldview, the more persuasive it became for everyone, including those getting bullied.

In junior high and high school, this absurd way of seeing the world became ingrained in the culture, and it was so pervasive that resisting it seemed impossible.  The social dynamics of this environment were something I didn't learn until years later -- and it wasn't until years after that that I learned how to navigate such social dynamics and work with people who bullied others as a way to prop themselves up. Fortunately, such attitudes became increasingly rare as grew older.  Over time, as people around them matured, those who insisted on sticking to the bullying tactics found themselves as the ones being ostracized.  Most of the reformed, and those who didn't found themselves unable to function in society.  I recently learned that one of the chief bullies from my adolescence is actually now in prison.  After dropping out of school, then spending years as a vagrant, he finally robbed a convenience store and was captured by the police.

That said, the idea that many of these people who seem like the kings and queens of the social scene in 8th grade might one day struggle to function as normal people in society seems hard to imagine when you're in the thick of it.

At the time the bullying was happening to me, it didn't help that I wasn't built like the other guys, physically or mentally.  They were getting bigger bodies, and tough-guy attitudes, while I was still small, slight, and sensitive.  While other guys were playing sports, I was drawing, holding philosophical conversations with adults, and even writing poetry.  I was good at it.  My imagination was my sanctuary, and I escaped there every day after school... Into books and artwork and fiction writing.  By the time high school rolled around, I was still far from "popular", but I managed to find a few friends who "got" me, and even a few girls who didn't give a shit what some of the popular kids thought of me.  They didn't care because they liked me for who I was.

Now I'm 37 years old, and I'm a successful manager at a software company.  I have a family, and as a hobby I still write fiction -- I'm actually a published author.  In addition, I've dabbled in filmmaking, and have written, directed, and produced 3 short films, all of which have won awards.  On the side, I've even started coaching people who struggle with the kinds of shame and insecurity that I once experienced for so long.

Most importantly, I've learned that I MATTER, that I'm unconditionally worthy of love and belonging, and that I'm equal to everyone else on the planet.  I don't need anyone else to affirm that for me, nor do I need to DO anything prove it.  I know it in my heart, and I carry it with me where ever I go.

It is my power, my birthright, like a light I have inside -- one that shines only for me.

Believe it or not, you have the light, too.  And it is always there, inside you, whether you see it or not.

Shame only conceals it temporarily.  It cannot snuff it out. Turn inward and you'll find it -- give it all your attention, and turn away from any thoughts about what other people think of you.

They key is learning to recognize and turn away from any thought you have that there is something wrong with you.  These thoughts are nonsense, they are meaningless optical illusions, like Escher drawings.  The only difference is that these illusions are actually dangerous.  They are illusions that can trap you.  That doesn't make them TRUE though.

The TRUTH is that the whole idea that it is POSSIBLE for there to be something wrong with a human being is nonsensical.  Everyone is whole and complete and perfect just as they are...  And those who seem imperfect or flawed are actually only pained and confused, so have some sympathy for them.  It will help you to create sympathy for yourself, even when you do things you later regret (which everyone does sometimes).

Lastly, always remember that as tough as things get, you CAN survive this, though it may be the toughest thing you've ever done...

This experience will make you stronger than you ever dared imagine.

Well, my name is Jp. & here's my story. I grew up in a pretty normal family, dad was in the military & my mom would take care of my siblings and I. I had a pretty normal childhood, I knew I was different though. It was before I went into kindergarten that I knew I didn't like girls. But of course, I didn't say anything. From 1st through 4th grade everything was perfectly fine. I had friends, I lived a normal life. As I entered the 5th grade, I still had a few friends, but not as much. I would talk to people and they would tell me mean things. I got blamed for stealing money, & books. I didn't think much of it though. I then started to feel alone. I didn't have any friends anymore. I was so sad. My parents were going through a separation, and I blamed myself for it. (I don't know why, I just felt guilty.) At school, I was being bullied more. I was told, "you're not cool cause you don't dress like us." & my teacher was in on it too. She said, "That's true, you should dress better." I cried at my desk, and my teacher said "Don't be a crybaby." During the month of May, we were told to make a Mother's Day gift for our Mom's. My teacher gave us the option to buy tiny pots for our gifts. One was a little more expensive. So I bought the expensive one. I was doing my work one day, and I told my teacher if I could start my gift. She said no, I have to finish my work first. As I turned around she told me. "Oh, you're too late to get a clear pot." I told her but I paid for one. She said, "To bad, you should have finished your work." I started to cry again.. Life at home wasn't easy either. Seeing my parents marriage fall apart was to much for me. I would get yelled at by my dad for not being manly enough about bullies at school. Then something popped into my head. Pain! If I put myself in pain it'll make the pain inside stop.. So that's exactly what I did. I inflicted pain on myself so I wouldn't feel the pain from school and from home. About the last week of school, I was fed up with the bullies. I figured, if I kill myself, it'll be over. I won't suffer anymore. So I wrote on my desk, "I'm gonna kill myself. & I don't care if you tell my parents, or anyone! Bye.." I got home, and took 9 to 10 pills. I was in the bathroom, when my mom rams the door and finds me on the floor.. She knew because the school called her and told her what I wrote. I was rushed to the hospital, and was taken care of.. I was then referred to a psychiatrist. Where I was diagnosed with depression. I was put on medication for two years. In the sixth grade, everything was normal. I just didn't talk to anyone. When I went to the 7th grade, I was starting to be bullied again. I paid no attention to the bullies this time. Until, a note was passed around the whole school about me. I cried everyday in class, the torture had started again. I was put on depression medication again. I was started to feel okay. But not completely. I was under constant watch all the time. 24/7 I went into the 9th grade. & high school was way better than elementary, and middle school. I started to feel comfortable with sexuality. It had just turned 2008, and I remember this day like yesterday. I was going home after school one afternoon. & I heard her, I heard this song called 'Just Dance' and I fell in love! High school was turning out okay. except for the cutting. I went deep with cutting. When I became a senior in High School, it was 2011. & I heard the song 'Born This Way' and I felt even way more comfortable with everything!! I felt so happy with my life. Everything for me changed. As soon as I accepted myself, the world did. Lady Gaga changed my life! She's made me feel confident, brave, empowered! I love her soo much! I wish I could thank her personally. Thank you Lady Gaga.

To be you is the best thing you could be. You can't change who you are you can't change who you were raised by. You make yourself unique. My freshman year at High School was horrible. I was tormented by this group if girls because of a boy and they made it their life mission to make my life horrible, and they weren't going to stop no matter what. I tried to change myself so I could fit in but no matter how much I tried I couldn't. I was getting made fun of everyday and bullied by these girls that I got to the point that I was done. I felt as if my time here was over I had nothing else to live for. The day I wrote my letter and the day I got on my bed to end it all end the pain and suffering I realized, what I'm I going to gain by doing this? They all win if I do this do I really want that? I got off my bed and once I did I decided to make a change. On November 23, 2012 my eyes opened and I decided it was time for things to change. I started a club at my school called the anti bullying club and I'm going to make this world wide. No matter what, not matter who, no matter how far people will know my story and hopefully things will change. My name is Emily and this is my story.

i was bullying so much. I always tried to stay home everyday

I am in my 50s now, but when I was in school, from grade school on, I was extensively bullied.  It began with my own kindergarten teacher making fun of me and the kids joined in.

By the time I hit middle school, I was not only being beaten up on the playground but suffering extensive abuse on the school bus, every day.  I could tell you horror stories...and we are talking the 60s and 70s.  Seeing this now has left me wondering how many kids back then ended their lives that we never heard about.  I only wish there had been something like this when I was growing up.

My mother was one of the few parents that did fight back.  She had to go to bat every year, but she did it, and I was allowed to sit in the seat right behind the bus driver, where I was left alone.  Instead of going out for recess, I was allowed to work in the library or play basketball.


This didn't change things like getting picked last for sports or dirty notes or the thousand other ways that kids can bully other kids.  I'm just testament that it continues going on.

I have not only witnessed it on the Internet, I have been the subject of bullying myself.  People need to realize that bullying does not stop with just children.  There are a lot of adults who engage in bullying as well and especially in the relative anonymity of the Internet.

What I'd like to see is a movement that addressed bullying at EVERY level.  I know if we start with the kids, it's a good thing, but don't stop there.  Spread the word to your fellow adults and even perfect strangers on the Internet.  Let them know that it is not okay to bully someone even if you think you won't be found out (as in real-life identity).  Let them know that the elderly are bullied and abused and not respected.  Let it be known that the disabled are likewise bullied.  And it's not confined to the Internet, either - it happens every single day, to adults as well as children.

Let's stop it all NOW.

~Leesa

Just finished watching the movie on Nexflix and I am outraged at the staff at the various school. As a future SLP hopefully working in the schools as well as a college student I will vow to protect my peers, children, and adults alike from bullying when I witness it. I was bullied as a child and was fortunate enough to have parents that were able to send me to a private all girls school which eliminated the problem for me but many children do not have this option.  To anyone being bullied hang in there because college is much different for me and you start to disregard simple minded people who bully and are celebrated for you unique qualities. 

 

Much love, 

Hayley 

I was teased / picked on/ bullied pretty much everyday beginning in 1st grade when I started a new school in a new town.  I was called fat, ugly, dog meat, etc.  I was always picked last in gym or as a partner if we had to pair-up.  If I was not being teased, I was being ignored.  Essentially I was rejected by my peers.  This went on throughout all of elementary school. 

When I started middle school, I thought maybe it would be better, that it would be a new start and I would not be singled out and picked on.  Unfortunately, middle school was worse.  I remember I sat at a particular table at lunch with a few girls.  It was the "unpopular table".  Actually, it was more like the "reject table".  Other students at lunch would walk by and say stuff like "gross", "nerds", "losers", etc.  One particular day in the lunchroom, a "friend" threatened to kick my ass.  I cried at the table in front of the entire lunch room.  You would think someone might feel bad and ask if I was okay.  Nope, no one did a thing.  People just laughed about it. 

There are many other examples.  People put gum in my hair and would hit me with spit balls.  I was called ugly a lot.  I would pretty much be left out all the time.  No one really wanted me around.  I only had a few friends.  There was a little bit of time in elementary school when my best friend moved away and I had no friends.  My mom asked me to invite a friend to the waterpark for my birthday.  It took me a while and I finally thought of a girl to call to invite.  I called her and asked her if she wanted to come to go to the waterpark with me.  She said no.  I ended up not going to the water park because I had no one to go with.

Bus rides were awful.  No one wanted to sit by me.  They wouldn't even make eye contact.  I remember one day in particular I had to ride a different bus than normal and it was packed.  I had to sit in a seat with two other people. They were trying to get me to move, they did not want me to sit by them.  Apparently, I disgusted them.  It was humiliating.  I was even picked on in Sunday school and conformation.  There just was not a "safe" place for me, a place I could be myself and just have fun. 

I am telling you my story so I can reach out and let you know I totally understand what you are feeling.  It is extremely painful to be rejected by your peers and teased at school.  It makes you wonder if you really are worthless.  Please understand that you are NOT WORTHLESS!   Remember too that THINGS WILL GET BETTER!   In my case, the bullying stopped around 9th grade.  I did not get teased after that.  I'm not sure why.  After I graduated high school, I went to college about two hours from home.   I met the most amazing people in college.   They are still my best friends and I love them very much.  I also met my husband in college.  He is wonderful.  I LOVE my life now.  I have a lot of fun and I have a lot of friends (none of which are from my home town, they are all friends I have met after I graduated high school).  I have actually been diagnosed with Post-traumatic stress disorder from my early years being rejected.  It did take me some time to learn to trust people and I had a lot of anger for a while.  Counseling has helped a ton!! 

Just remember, you will not be in school or around the people who treat you poorly forever.  Eventually, the bullying WILL END.  Also remember that it IS NOT YOUR FAULT you are being teased.  The people who are doing the teasing that have the problem.  I do not understand how they can treat someone so badly.  Why do they do it?  I don't know, but I suspect they have a lot of their own issues they don't know how to address in a healthy manner.  To be honest, I would rather have been teased than to have been the bully.  I am happy that I am an empathetic individual who is RESPECTFUL AND CARING TO EVERYONE! 

I promise, you will be okay.  Everything will be okay!  Hang in there!  You are tough and smart and AMAZING!  Don't allow anyone make you believe anything different!

Much love and support,

Brooke

In elementary school I wasn't a very popular child. I was what most consider a nerd, geek and pretty awkward, but i've always had a good heart. I was called names, taunted and brought to tears from elementary all the way to my freshman year of high school. I was overweight, had acne and had little to no social skills. The turning point was my sophmore year. I was finsihed with tears and feeling that I would never be "accepted" and tranferred that energy in being the best me I could be.