I am the kind of girl who talks to everyone. I'm very social and pretty open. I'll talk to you if you talk to me. I've always been this way. Sometimes, though, that isn't a very good thing. I am a 13 year old girl in the 8th grade, trying to get by in life. Keep my grades up, try to make my family proud and my friends. With all this being said, like every girl, I have my down moments. Every year since I started the 5th grade, I have somehow been harassed in some way. Ok, so let start from the beginning.

So, in fifth grade, I was friends with this girl. Lets call her....Clara (although, that is not her real name). Clara and I were best friends. We hung out together and she brought me to her dance classes. I was with her when she was going through rough times and she was there for me. Until one day, she started to get snobby and bossy. Telling me what to do. I felt like she was trying to control my life!! One day, I had started talking to a girl I at first, didn't like. She had a little reputation for being reported a lot. But, at the time, I thought those were all rumors. So when Clara went on her cruise, I hung out with, lets say her name is Ashlyn (of course, not her real name). We got pretty close. We were good friends. Once Clara came back, she took offense to this. She thought I betrayed her. Which, I didn't. I still hung out with Clara. Ashlyn too. Both at the same time. Clara didn't like this. So, she started not to talk to me anymore just because I was friends with Ashlyn. Clara started to send me really mean messages on GirlSense (which is now shut down). I used to get so mad over these messages. If they didn't have that safety typing thing, she would have been cussing at me. Trying to defend myself, I messaged her back. Being young and foolish, I didn't realize that I was just adding fire with fire. I used to come home from school and go on this website. Not to see what she said, but because it was my favorite website at the time. She used to call me names and my friends names. I don't exactly how this cyber bullying ended, but all I remember was that her mother was informed by this, but instead of punishing her daughter, she hated me. But, Clara was just like her mother anyway. They both think they are the best of the best. But, that's ok. It's not my business.

Now sixth grade. sixth grade was actually probably my worst middle school year so far. Clara had come back to haunt me, but with a new sidekick. My friend....Rachel (not her real name) and I were ok friends. She knew some things about me, I knew some things about her. Her boyfriend at the time was my buddy. He was and still is my pal. He's not exactly the nicest kid, not even close, but he's nice to me and makes me laugh. Well, one day, we were joking around as usual, when Rachel had the idea that I was trying to steal her man. Now let me tell yah, I did not like this boy that way. He was just a good friend of mine that I felt comfortable around. Now Clara and Rachel had just started talking not long before this. I didn't particularly like that she was, but at the same time, I really didn't mind this. Although, one day in March of 2011, I was backstabbed. Rachel had turned on me for Clara. They started sitting together and talking about me. Sometimes, I could hear little mumbles from them with my name in their sentences. Other times, I would hear them giggle across the room and look at me. They used to purposely stand behind me before class and talk to each other saying "Oh Rachel, I would never EVER try to still your boyfriend from you. I'm an actual friend." "You are right Clara, you are really an actual friend. And you wouldn't try to hurt me, now would you?" "Of course not, we are TOO close!" See what I mean? They geared thing stuff towards me. Clara would pretend to stab me with a pencil in the back of my head. They would laugh about this. One day, sometime at the end of March, Rachel started to feel bad about what she was doing. She tried to start talking to me again. Although, this only happened because my mother reported it to the school and they got in trouble. She started giving me notes, saying she was sorry. She wouldn't say it to my face though. Being my stubborn self, I didn't want to talk to her. Unfortunately, she did tell me what they were calling me. They called me stupid, dumb, man stealer, the b word, and much more. But, what really stuck out was my label for them, MST. MST meant Main Street Trash. I technically never lived on Main Street (a bad part of town) just the corner of it. Which, by the way, was a different street. I remember having meltdowns, I'd cry to my mom, who was my best friend through this. When it was finally over, I saw the sun come out. But only for a little while.

This is Part 1 of my story, I feel like it should be in two parts, so Part 2 will be up soon!

When you're a child, the sun couldn't shine any brighter above your eyes. Glistening down on a beautiful world created by your own imagination. Everything is so fascinating and adventurous. You couldn't picture a place more graceful than the very one you grew in each day. I used to be a child of joy and pure happiness. I used to smile everyday for the things the great man in the sky had given me. But that only lasted so long. Like a record, it can only play so long before it stops. Then you got to switch to another. Unfortunately some of us end up receiving that record that plays nothing other than the songs of a long lost child. You pray the next track will be the new start to a better life, but it isn't. At least not yet. It wasn't til' 6th grade, and all the way to 12th, that I began to experience the life of the underdog. Bullied everyday I entered the building. I've been called almost every name in the book of a failure. Because that's what the monsters make you feel like. Like your a big joke. A waste of space. And I won't lie, the words stick to your mind like a drug. You become so addicted to remembering these negative conflicts that you yourself begin to believe them aswell. You turn on the tv and see that a nine year old took his own life because his bully forced him to. Only nine years and he's missed out on the life God had planned for him. An amazing husband with a beautiful wife and two children as beautiful as a field of flowers. But that field has been burned to ashes by a man/woman who made you believe your life wasn't worth existing. I've attempted ending my own, three times actually. Because like a drug the words haunted my head like demon eating away everything that made me happy. I left all those who bullied and taunted me, beat me to the ground. And I stayed down there only to avoid anymore bullet wounds. But that's not the life God wants us to have. No it surely is not. He wants us to rise together, hand to hand, embracing a beautiful story He has written out for each of us. Because we're His children and He loves us unconditionally. So I look in the mirror, tears streaming down my face from the pain my heart has taken on, and I tell myself I am a beautiful treasure. I tell that person looking back at me that I am blistered and burnt, but I'm being built into a warrior. A bold human being who will reach my hand out to those who've taken on the same enemies as myself. There's a beautiful song by a band called Flyleaf. The song is called "Breaks Your Knees". And in that song a young woman who's struggled herself quotes "life is just a breath, a mist of what's to come". Meaning yes life is the roughest story you'll ever take on. But. Its only a lot like mist, it doesn't last forever. Where heaven is this beautiful enchanted world of forever. No pain, no sorrow, only happiness and love. I'm still learning to this day how to survive the words that break you down. But I believe if we all join one another, we can over-power the demons that try to knock us down. Spilling God's glory into our veins, giving us the strength to overcome any obstacle. Leave your past behind you where it belongs. Lift your head to the light, and let your story be told. Because nobody should be bullied for being different. We were each made in a different unique way. And as a thank you the man above, we shall explode with beauty and compassion. This story came from the person inside who truly believes we can defeat those monsters, and regain that happiness we once held as a child. You're beautiful, now step into the new horizons and live the life you were meant to. Love you all greatly.

 

 

Founded in the hope that one day our world will be bully free.

 

Bullying impacts everyone.  Not a week goes by without hearing about a devastating result of bullying.  It is a global problem and it involves nearly every age group.  My name is Deb Pellegrini.  When my oldest son, who has Tourette Syndrome, was bullied and emotionally traumatized daily in 6^th grade, I knew that I had to find a way to reduce this behavior and prevent other children from being bullied.

 

1^st Stone for Peacebuilding started with the idea of the 1^st Stone message (“1^st Stone,I will not throw,” based partly on Jesus’ message “Let he without sin cast the first stone.”) in November 2012.  Over the next several months it expanded into jewelry making and sales to raise anti-bullying awareness and to emphasize our personal responsibility to reduce bullying. 

 

During this time, I was also studying peacebuilding, and became a certified Peace Ambassador in August 2013.  Through my studies, I learned about peaceful conflict mediation and resolution skills.  These skills have been used to reduce and resolve conflict in highly volatile areas of the world.  There are outstanding programs for preschool through high school available for free on line.  I envisioned that if children were taught these skills in school, they would develop the mindset of being a peacemaker and peace builder in their communities and beyond.  They will also have the tools to resolve conflicts in a peaceful manner.  I believe that this knowledge will reduce bullying in schools and into adulthood. 

 

I decided to combine my two anti-bullying visions to create 1^st Stone for Peacebuilding.  Through the sales of 1^st Stone jewelry and products, I am raising money for schools to integrate peacebuilding curriculum into their current curriculum, and eventually to bring in world-changing peace builders to speak to the students and further inspire them.  To my knowledge, this is the first anti-bullying program to combine these two concepts.

 

With the support of my family and friends, I have been able to raise money to initiate my vision (starting November 4, 2013) in my son’s current school in Wake County, NC.   My hope is that this concept will spread to all Wake County schools and beyond.  Together we can build a more peaceful and caring world. For more information, you can email me at [email protected].

 I am your average student. I have a hard time trusting others. I have had too many friends betray me and become people who put me down. I have hid my real personality behind a shield. On the surface I am a confident A honor role student who has lots of friends and has a perfect life. In reality I am rather shy and dark. I am a fierce friend and I hide my true feelings. I haven't opened up completely to my closest friends who I have known for years. I am afraid they will abandon me like all the rest if I start being who I really am. I am ok with all ways of like whether it is a religion, belief, sexual orientation, or something else. I accept it all. Everyone deserves to be happy but only one or two of my friends agree with this. It makes me sad. I continue to hide behind my shell but it seems that whenever  I let people get a glimpse of what is past my outer shell many act shocked, confused, and some have looked at me like I am one of the mystery meats in the school cafeteria. It makes me put up even more walls. I have been like this for years and I am getting worried. I have built up so many walls around my heart and now I don't know how to break free. Will people ever know the real me who is screaming on the inside stuck, like a wild animal in a cage? I feel like that sometimes. i feel like  I am screaming on the inside and banging the walls of an imaginary cage trying to get free while people watch with disgust. the only person Intrust fully is my mother and I talk to her about everything but I can't seem to tell her this. It is easier to write my feelings out like this to anonymous people while I am hidden behind my computer screen. So now I ask this. I'd there anyone who knows how to break free from a shell like this? 

My name is Richie Jewell. I'm 21 years old and I have autism since I was born. Like everyone else in the world, I have an up-down life like a sea-saw. I went through some of the stuff that has been a rocky roadblock during my life. It was very challenging to live through the times that I endured during my life such as teasing, on and off depression, struggling to adapt in places including schools, helplessly observe my parents’ divorce and the struggles with my disability like problems with speech and language, communication, awkwardness in social situations, screaming and crying when I was young out of frustration. Well despite all of those horrible obstacles that tried to cut me down, I would overcome them by using my own set of coping skills:

Getting through one day at a time, knowing that happiness and smiles triumphs. When I had no friends due to the disability, I pretended that my stuffed animals as if they were my own and practiced it for later on. Whenever I'm in a negative situation, I dream myself a happy place with beautiful nature and happiness all around me. I also remind myself that everything happens for a reason in life, I always ask myself, “Why do we fall? So, we can learn to pick ourselves up”, and most of all, writing poems from my heart with the help and comfort from family, friends, my hobbies, which include animals, wrestling, movies, writing, and inspiration. Those things I just mentioned are the huge puzzle pieces of my life.

So you're curious on what I do for a living, right? Currently, I work at a local library in Beacon, NY to get some money. Outside the job, I'm a writer, motivational speaker and world/autism advocate to reach out people and raise their spirits. I'm writing a book now titled This is Me: My Life with Autism which talks about my struggles and triumphs with the disability throughout my life. I do speeches at public places such as schools and libraries to raise awareness of autism, world problems, my struggles with my disability and most of all inspire people to new heights. Why this profession? I'm doing this for the people who have been laughed at, ridiculed, looked at the wrong way, have been told you can't do anything, you won't go far in life or bullied including myself and show them that we are in this together to help the world by raising awareness on not just autism but the world problems as well. I want to show support to people who are in a struggle like I was. I want to be the symbol that anything is possible. I had a dream that one day: this world will rise above the hate and realize what we are doing to ourselves. In one day, we are going to treat each other with kindness. This dream will become a reality if we all follow the steps: think, act and change. Gandhi once said, “We must become the change we want to see.” Believe that you can change the world. My theory is that changing the world cannot be kept by force but educating ourselves. If that happens, then the dream can become a reality and finally my voice will be heard. You’re probably think that I'm a dreamer but I’m not the only one dreams. Someday, you'll believe in my vision. And the world will be as one.

The message I want to is that anyone with a disability can make this happen. Everyone has a voice to be heard and I want them to hear mine, on making the world better and getting them to think what does it take to get better. I learned a long time ago that you don't have to scream and holler to get attention, because if a person has enough power to speak softly, they'll listen to you. It's a slow process but it will be done, plus me having a disability makes it even more intriguing, understanding and challenging. Everyone should be the likes of Charlie Brown, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer or Dumbo the Elephant, in a sense where despite all of those odds stacked against them and being tormented by peers, They appreciate them for who they are and embrace the traits on what we and they have. If 7 Billion people in the world became one of them, maybe we could stop society's bleeding known as bullying. Everyone has a story to tell, you got to make the best of life in order to be successful. I'm just an average person trying to make a big change in the world's society so we can live in a healthy, peaceful and beautiful environment that makes us adaptable for our home called Earth. Like everyone else in the world, we have a long hard road ahead of us. However, we will never give up. Do not pray for an easy life. Hope for the strength to endure a difficult one. If you're going through a difficult life, just remember we are not alone because you might never know who is enduring the same struggles you've encountered. Don't look backwards into the past because we will fall. You can't spend your life looking back. You must spend your life looking forward, because you can't change what has happened. If I look back, there's someone else who is looking forward that will go right by me. You can't reach for the past. It's happened. It's gone. By then, we will live in a healthy life. We are amazing creatures with a powerful ability to overcome obstacles. Your life is your message to the world: Make it inspiring and create a difference! Just like what I'm doing right now!

My inspiration to this cause is my heroes of my life: Robin Williams, Jesse Saperstein, Steve Irwin, John Lennon, Rachel Joy Scott, God, Jesus Christ and most importantly, close friends and family. Every day, there will be new challenges that are going to confront me but I will get stronger and more confident as I conquered them. I always live by a quote, made by Muppet creator Jim Henson, in order to continue my journey of life. And i quote: "Life is meant to be fun, joyous, and fulfilling. May each of yours be that - having each of you as a child of mine has certainly been one of the good things in my life. Know that I've always loved each of you with an eternal, bottomless love. A love that has nothing to do with each other, for I feel my love for each of you is total and all-encompassing. Please watch out for each other and love and forgive everybody. It’s a good life, enjoy it."

What does my future have in stored for me after this? Well, who knows? I'm not a psychic and I can't predict the future. The only thing I can do now is accomplish more speeches and keep writing my book so I would have a great future ahead of me. In order to be successful, I could try give the best advice which follows: Accept responsibility for your life. Know that it is you who will get you where you want to go and want to be, no one else. Reach into your heart and soul to discover your talent. Sometimes, people's talents fade away and you lose something special so, hold on to it. If your talent or idea helps you, then let it set you free from the obstacles that are currently destroying your spirit. Follow your dreams and heart by listening to that “whisper” inside your head speaking to you. If you listen to it, you'll go somewhere. Cherish your visions and dreams because they are the blueprint of the achievements you succeeded. You've got to figure out what it is you love - who you really are and have the courage to do that. Remember that you have to be proud of what you're doing. Always ignore bad and insincere criticism if you're doing what makes you happy. There are many opinions about your work , never let voices put you down, the only one you have listen to is your own. Be yourself and become proud for that because you are original, special for you who are and everyone else is taken. Look for the good in every day. Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities! Believe in your own potential for greatness. There are many individuals whom become successful and simply put a hold on their life. No matter what successes or failures you encounter in life, you must live life, love harder, open doors, stay positive, create opportunities, and most importantly, continuously improve. We experience struggles and challenges that confront us every single day, as time goes on, you get stronger by defeating them. Our hope is you will “never stop” learning, teaching, and dreaming. This message will remind you to push harder, strive for more, stay positive, remain strong and be yourself to live the life you always imagined. All you need to do is enjoy and live life to the fullest. It's something that is within each of us. Repeat these steps every day, and you will become successful.

The contributions that I have for my success right now are dedication, confidence, patience and support. Because of those, I can believe in myself. I have confidence in my ability to make it to the top and accomplish one goal at a time. My biggest supports I have are my family and close friends. I have them stored in my head and will remember them for life. I shall never let anyone change me or break my spirit because mines powerful. If I could snap my fingers and be non-autistic, I would not because then, it wouldn't be me. Autism is part of who I am and what made me so unique. Like I said before, everyone has a story to tell and it is our duty to make the best out of what life has given us. This who I am and always will be: I am Richie Jewell.

When I was younger I went through stages; for a few years I was very popular, then as time went on I was no longer the "cool" kid. I was known as the not so attractive, not a football star and kid that no one talked to or hung out with. This was in high school. I then was pushed around and called all sorts of names simply because I was a christian and didn't do things others did. I was considered weird. I was told I was better off dead, I was told that I would never get married because I was too ugly. I was told that even my parents didn't want me they were just too afraid to tell me. I would get "bumped" in the hall ways, I would get laughed at and mocked for no reason. This all went on for years and no one did a thing. I even started to believe the lies. A few years later as I got older I realized these lies were not true and I made myself successful. I started my own business (officially) as a softmore in high school; by graduation I was making roughly 5,000-8,000 a month. I also was in a band that gained success quickly. We toured all over PA, NY, and OH. We even signed a small record deal in Oklahoma City. Of course as this success became known, I now was oh so poular to my old classmates. The very same ones who mocked me and laughed at me. The girls who called me ugly all of a sudden wanted to be my friends.

I never really had any one who was there from the start. everyone either is just giving me pity and felt sorry, but they don't change. all they do is judge, call me names, and punch me. my school has a bully box, where you report the bullying but nothing ever happens with that price of paper. it just sits there. it's absolutely crazy. something needs to change.

Because of my fathers work our family had to move around a lot. Every time we moved I had to adjust to new people, new classmates. Sometimes it was fun, but at a certain age kids feel like they have to show their dominance and pick on the new kid. I found a way to get the bullies off me quick; crying. Bad idea..it worked in the short run, but it made me more a target. The crying wasn't even real, it was just a defence machanism, that worked. The actual crying was done alone, in bed in the evening, knowing that the next day would be as terrible as the day before..and in the morning, knowing it was going to happen this day. I would hurt myself..hate myself. Knowing nothing would change. Talking to my parents wasn't an option at all...their advise was that they should take me to school to take care of me....wich would be totally counterproductive, obviously. So I just took it.. Then I went to "highschool" (dutch variation of it)...I thought I could start over...unfortunatelly we lived in a village community...so the same kids came to the same highschool. It took a while..but I found a couple of friends...some stabbed me in the back to make themselves look cooler, some friends stayed. Then I had a breakthrough; I made some painting on my schoolbag of the comic "the punisher". One of the hard-rock kids read the comic too..and we became friends. I kept my bullied friends close, but hung out with the hard-rock crew too..and I found some sort of peace. Just when everything was going fine....we moved again. I knew that I would just have to go to school there for 2 years before I would go to universtity..so I didn't even try to make friends. During recess I would just hang out by myself, minding my own buisiness...and people came to me, to hang out....and from then on I stopped trying. From all the beating I realised that I shouldn't try to make friends...friends make themselves.

Even now (I'm 38 now), I don't have hang-out friends, but the people I consider friends are people who would take a bullet for me, and I for them. The "Goonies" scenario, isn't for everyone. Be selective.

it does hurt me once in a while when my family is suprised that I wasn't happy in that period...they never seemed to notice. My mother always told me, as a "goodbye", "don't get yourself bullied!"...smiling. I kept it to myself, explaining the bruises I caused myself with some shitty story. My parents never knew, eventhough I tried to tell them. They couldn't imagine the sadness I felt every morning waking up, as I am sure that things have changed so much since my childhood and I can't even try to relate how things are now.

I have no advise....my "hapiness" came from letting go....friends come naturally, don't try, you are not alone...with all the social media there are always people you can talk to. And...if I would give any advise; it will get better. As far as I can tell, or say anything....the quiet ones are the most talented and intelligent people...people who prefer listening over talking. I work with people all over the world now who think the way I think, who complete eachothers sentences. None of the friends I have now would have picked on me when I was young...and the people who did? No idea where they are, and I don't care.

Just for fucks sake; don't do anything to hurt yourself or anyone else. You are not alone.....

 

I am Martin Tedder on facebook and my email is [email protected]

DC: You had written in your book about being bullied as a boy for being Jewish and overweight. Can you touch on this for a moment? How has life gotten better for you?

LJ:  I had a great childhood and lived in a middle class neighborhood in Long Beach where there was, I would say, the average amount of bullying of kids.  This stuff happened as a little kid when I was about seven or eight years old. Some of the uneducated parents were anti-Semitic and that translated to their kids who called kids like me "Dirty Jew. I remember one kid saying, "Hitler should have finished the job."  But that doesn't mean all of the kids (or I should say, parents) felt that way.  There was a golf country club in the area that didn't allow Jews and so that's the place we used to go at night and ride ice blocks down their beautiful green lawns. LOL I was also pushed around and laughed at for being chubby.  I must have been a good diplomat though, because I only really remember being in one fight as a kid. LOL Does it get better? OH YEAH.  I'm still Jewish and I'm still a bit chubby, and I'm gay, but I don't get laughed at or teased anymore.  The story in the book you refer to is when we were being bullied and it ended because Ken and I both stood up and said, "No, we're not going to be bullied by you...Get off of our boat!"  And look at me, a successful businessman, a great relationship, and I've joined one of the most elite clubs in the world--circumnavigators.  So I'd say it gets WAY better...I'm a living example of that, and I want kids to see how great life can be. 

From: An interview with Larry Jacobson, Author of The Boy Behind the Gate. 

Interview by Dorothy's Closet

http://larryjacobson.com

 

We have recently re-located to Glennville Georgia, and because of where we live, my daughter had to go to a School that is about 40 minutes away, compared to the School that is 15 minutes away. She attends Walker Elementary School in Ludowici Georgia. My daughter is a special needs child, and is in a wheelchair half the time. She suffers from Juvenile Rhematoid arthritis, which leaves her in constant pain. The School she attends is a regular School, and we were told from day one, the School Prides itself on the 0 tolerance of Bullying. My daughter has always been a model student which exceptional grades. Well one girl in her class, decided it would be fun to start Bullying my daughter. I've spent countless days complaining to the School, talking with the Teachers, having my daughter moved away from this girl, countless E-Mails to the School Principal, to this day I've had to file a Police Report on this girl, and I get a phone call from the Officer and she tells me well I'll make the report, but I would call this maybe border line Harassment, but definetly not Bullying, so it will just get filed. The girl seems to never get in trouble she continues to Bully my daughter on a daily basis, and I'm at my wits end, as the School just seems to push it all under the rug, and the only thing they tell me is that "Well we have no proof" so there is nothing we can do. Meanwhile my daughter now does not want to go back to School, her grades are dropping, and she is just not the happy little girl she used to be. I don't want my daughter to suffer anymore from any of this, and I just don't know where else to turn to.