Hi,

When I was younger in the 6th-8th grade in 2003-2004 (currently 23) I was a victim of bullying and of physical abuse by kids at my middle school for coming out as a lesbian and for being overweight... I had 4 major bullies in middle school and they caused me nothing but hell and grief to the point I wanted to commit suicide.... Yesterday out of the blue 1 of the 4 bullies came forward and gave me a heartfelt apology for how she treated me in middle school...... I would really like to share this story with kids and to show them that even years later some bullies do apologize and it does give closure to those they bullied.... Her name is Mandy (name changed)

Mandy: Hey Liz from time to time i remember being mean/bullying to you in middle school. I want to tell you how sorry i am for that and how much i regret doing so to this day. I was a dumb kid trying to fit in at the expense of others and i just want you to know it deeply bothers me to this day that I did so. I am so sorry if i ever caused any pain you are a beautiful strong person and deserve the best just like anybody else.....

Me: Why did you tell me this now?? After so many years.... Are you telling me this now as another joke or to poke fun at me for believing you??? You, and 3 others where my worst tormentors in school, you all made me want to kill myself (which is why i moved away after middle school)..... You all treated me bad just because i came out as gay, and that i was overweight.... I don’t understand why u tell me now....

Mandy: No i truly mean it i was hurting on the inside myself. I'm so sorry for the pain i caused. I was angry as a child it took me YEARS to get over this anger and to find myself i hated myself when I was younger i was just taking it out on you. I am so sorry Elizabeth i can’t take back what I did but I can at least tell you how much i regret it and how much it will always bother me about myself, it is what I deserve. You have been in my subconscious for a very long time i don’t know why I didn't say something before maybe because I was too coward too or because of the shame i felt for treating you like that. I was watching a documentary on bullying and it literally brought tears to my eyes how these kids were being treated and what happened because of it. I thought of you again and figured it would only be right for you to know that i recognize what I did and i am not proud of it.

Me: Well thank you very much for coming forward.... At least 1 of 4 has.... And the documentary is called BULLY.... We showed it here in my town to everyone and to all the schools.... I and several others talked about our childhood and being bullied.... Thank you for some closure though...

Mandy: Your welcome i wish i would have done it sooner i was just a stupid kid trying to fit in none of it was ever true about you.

when i started to enter puberty stage, i noticed my body changing. As i experienced my first mensturation, i immediately ased my  mother. She guided me on how to take good care of myself. That was when i could not open up to some of my girl classmates at school because i belive they are not yet on that stage. I suddenly unintentionally heard them questioning why i was leaving the classroom third time in a row during our 2 hours class in eng. The next thing i know, most of them doesn't talk to me that much anymore. That was the first time that i felt so alone. I did not know how to approach people at that time. I stayed silent, ashamed of what i was becomming. Then i eventually had acnes on my face and most of it grew larger on my nose. I began going to school covering my face with a hankerchief. I could not kep on hiding it when i needed to do things at school that needed both of my hands. One of my classmates asked me "what's that on your nose?" When i told them that it was an acne, i could that he's confused and discusted by it too (as well as my other groupmates at that time). The next days past by and i've suddenly encountered two to three male classmates of mine standing in the hallway calling me "tigidigyawat" which is a very offensive term in the Philippines that is used to call a person with acnes. I was so angry that i heard it from my classmates. They seemed to enjoy from calling me that. I was also very ashamed because our other classmates heard it too. I felt that some of them felt sorry for me but most of them seems to be so amused by it. I started not talking so much to them. I only became close to a male classmate who also happens to be bullied because he was tall and very thin. His name was Paolo. He was also a friend of Rochelle who also happens to be bullied by other girls because she's fat. Both of them became my seatmates during our second grading. As i knew them better every single day, i really thought that they were really cool! ^_^ For Paolo,  I did not see any negative about him because he always recites and he's always very attentive during our science class. Rochelle has this very good writing ability and was also a fan of filipino rap songs (which was very popular back then). All of us shared our interests in science, music and friendship :) Even though we had a very tough childhood (Paolo being beaten up by his foster father, rochelle feeling incomplete because shes adopted, me to have experienced bullying from my cousin Joana) (among other issues in our lives) we kept on supporting each other and always trying our very best to be with each other especially when we feel verry sad about school. I really do hope that there will be no more innocent quetions from children when it comes to puberty. I really think that parents should always have their time with their children when they're at home. Children should be educated about the things that makes teenagers confused during their age. They should be taught how to treat others as to how they want to be treated by others too. May children also become close to their parents as they grow. May parents pass on great wisdom to their children too :) Peace and may God always bless us all ^_^

"Do to others what you want others to do unto you" Golden Rule No.1 Confucius

It was all last year. I was a victim of bullying. All the guys would call me a cunt or a skank or even a slut. They used to say how I was a bitch and nobody liked me, and even my family didn't care about me. I was nice to them, and had no idea why they were so mean to me. I didnt fit in with anybody really but two people. Two people who are my best friends and mean the world to me. They are the reason I never killed myself. I knew how much it would hurt them if I had taken my life. I couldn't handle it anymore, getting called a bitch, prostitute, skank, slut, sleazy, pussy, cunt, anything like that. I heard it all. I wore a skirt once last year, never again after that. It was long enough for dress code, so it was to my knees. I had a shirtsleeve shirt on, that nobody ever saw that day, I kept my sweater on so I wasnt showing my skin because I got called so many names. I'll never forgrt those guys and girls who just made fun of me every day. It was constantly happening. No hitting or physical harm done by them, only tormenting and verbal aggression. One day I got a message anonymously from somebody, it was telling me how I was worthless and I was wasting space in this world by just being here. It told me to go into the woods and hang myself because nobody wanted me here. Hang myself just so nobody had to go through the pain of me being In their preseance. I nearly did that. I wanted to kill myself. I didn't feel welcome, and I felt that nobody really did want me on this planet, and that I truly was worthless. That day I broke down, and I couldn't take it anymore. I cried and I cried, not knowing what to do. I almost did go and kill myself that day, but I didn't. I called my mother and told her I needed her to come home. I was on the phone with her crying, cuz I told her about the message. She kept me on the phone and made me keep talking so she knew I was there and wasn't trying to kill myself. She got home and grabbed me and hugged me tight and wouldn't let go. She was so scared that I was going to do something and she was going to lose me. She called the cops to see what they would do, but they couldn't do anything becsuse it wasn't a treat that the person was going I kill me. They couldn't see who it was who had sent the message either. All they did was told my mother to contact my school. She did, and nothing happened. Weeks go by and things are starting to escalate a bit more. The stuff they were saying were getting worse. I never told anybody though, cuz I didn't want to feel weak. I didn't stand up for myself either. I just tried to ignore it, but that didn't work. Nobody ever stood up for me, but once. Immediately that boy started getting made fun if for it, so he said he was kidding about what he said and he stared making fun of me. I called my mom at school crying saying I couldn't take it and wanted to go home. She wanted to know what was happening, so I told her and she called my school. The guidance counselor called me into her office to have me tell her what was going on. She told me not to go home because they were going to take action of it that day. They never did it that day. Things kept happening and my mother would continuously call the school till something happened. Nothing happened till about two weeks later. One kid was suspended for a couple of days, but that was it. The bullying started to stop, because the kids were called into the office. Finally the kids stopped that year. but now it has started up again with this year. I still get bullied by the one kid though that got suspended. Lots of the people who are around when it happens stand up for me though, and I stand up for myself too. Because of him bullying me, nobody really likes him. I think it's sad that nobody really likes him, but i believe that's just gods way if punishing him for all that he has done. I still don't always believe I fit in, but i try to fit in now, and each day I give it a little bit more effort than the day before. I am becoming popular now because I'm nice to everybody, how I stood up to all the bullies when nobody else did, and because of how I help people out when they are in need of help. I even have a boyfriend now too who I truly love. Even with all of that, because if the bullying I still don't believe I do truly belong here, but now with all the people I have by my side, it helps a lot. I look back everyday on what happened to me, and how lucky I am to have the things I have, the people I have around me, and the love those people give to me. being bullied made me stronger than I ever was before, and it made me the better person I am today. I'm not saying that good things always come out of bullying, because we all know that's not true, but because of all of it, it's helped make many people change for the better. if we all just come together and stand up to bullies, people won't have to suffer through he pain everyday. Every time some one is bullied, tell your school, a teacher, anybody. The more they will realize they have to take care of it. So don't just sit back and watch it all happen, take action and put a stop to this bullying.

It was all last year. I was a victim of bullying. All the guys would call me a cunt or a skank or even a slut. They used to say how I was a bitch and nobody liked me, and even my family didn't care about me. I was nice to them, and had no idea why they were so mean to me. I didnt fit in with anybody really but two people. Two people who are my best friends and mean the world to me. They are the reason I never killed myself. I knew how much it would hurt them if I had taken my life. I couldn't handle it anymore, getting called a bitch, prostitute, skank, slut, sleazy, pussy, cunt, anything like that. I heard it all. I wore a skirt once last year, never again after that. It was long enough for dress code, so it was to my knees. I had a shirtsleeve shirt on, that nobody ever saw that day, I kept my sweater on so I wasnt showing my skin because I got called so many names. I'll never forgrt those guys and girls who just made fun of me every day. It was constantly happening. No hitting or physical harm done by them, only tormenting and verbal aggression. One day I got a message anonymously from somebody, it was telling me how I was worthless and I was wasting space in this world by just being here. It told me to go into the woods and hang myself because nobody wanted me here. Hang myself just so nobody had to go through the pain of me being In their preseance. I nearly did that. I wanted to kill myself. I didn't feel welcome, and I felt that nobody really did want me on this planet, and that I truly was worthless. That day I broke down, and I couldn't take it anymore. I cried and I cried, not knowing what to do. I almost did go and kill myself that day, but I didn't. I called my mother and told her I needed her to come home. I was on the phone with her crying, cuz I told her about the message. She kept me on the phone and made me keep talking so she knew I was there and wasn't trying to kill myself. She got home and grabbed me and hugged me tight and wouldn't let go. She was so scared that I was going to do something and she was going to lose me. She called the cops to see what they would do, but they couldn't do anything becsuse it wasn't a treat that the person was going I kill me. They couldn't see who it was who had sent the message either. All they did was told my mother to contact my school. She did, and nothing happened. Weeks go by and things are starting to escalate a bit more. The stuff they were saying were getting worse. I never told anybody though, cuz I didn't want to feel weak. I didn't stand up for myself either. I just tried to ignore it, but that didn't work. Nobody ever stood up for me, but once. Immediately that boy started getting made fun if for it, so he said he was kidding about what he said and he stared making fun of me. I called my mom at school crying saying I couldn't take it and wanted to go home. She wanted to know what was happening, so I told her and she called my school. The guidance counselor called me into her office to have me tell her what was going on. She told me not to go home because they were going to take action of it that day. They never did it that day. Things kept happening and my mother would continuously call the school till something happened. Nothing happened till about two weeks later. One kid was suspended for a couple of days, but that was it. The bullying started to stop, because the kids were called into the office. Finally the kids stopped that year. but now it has started up again with this year. I still get bullied by the one kid though that got suspended. Lots of the people who are around when it happens stand up for me though, and I stand up for myself too. Because of him bullying me, nobody really likes him. I think it's sad that nobody really likes him, but i believe that's just gods way if punishing him for all that he has done. I still don't always believe I fit in, but i try to fit in now, and each day I give it a little bit more effort than the day before. I am becoming popular now because I'm nice to everybody, how I stood up to all the bullies when nobody else did, and because of how I help people out when they are in need of help. I even have a boyfriend now too who I truly love. Even with all of that, because if the bullying I still don't believe I do truly belong here, but now with all the people I have by my side, it helps a lot. I look back everyday on what happened to me, and how lucky I am to have the things I have, the people I have around me, and the love those people give to me. being bullied made me stronger than I ever was before, and it made me the better person I am today. I'm not saying that good things always come out of bullying, because we all know that's not true, but because of all of it, it's helped make many people change for the better. if we all just come together and stand up to bullies, people won't have to suffer through he pain everyday. Every time some one is bullied, tell your school, a teacher, anybody. The more they will realize they have to take care of it. So don't just sit back and watch it all happen, take action and put a stop to this bullying.

Having the last name of "Pugh" coupled with not capable of reading in third grade was a recipe to be bullied. From 3rd to 6th grade at Holy Redeemer School, I was verbally and physically abused. The weight of that experience has not left me in over 50 years. It has permeated every part of my life to the point of depression and many thoughts of suicide. It effects my family and friends. I have been dealing with it in therapy and with art (photography and painting). My life and ego has suffered greatly every day. Never ever seeing the light of day nor will I ever think it will. When I think there is compassionate ear to express myself . . . I'm wrong. They have a masked face of compassion. . . Then they are gone looking at me as a freak. And the pain starts all over again. I am a visual artist within me I scream silently.

out class sa klase

So from the start of junior school up until my last years of school I was bullied, verbally and physically. I never did anything to cause problems, I was very shy and and pretty normal looking kid. Through 8 schools in 2 different countries you would think that maybe the bullying would stop, but it didn't, same stuff different place really. No need to get into detail as if you are reading you probably have the general idea, but the worst time was when I moved to the UK (I am from Australia). It was the first time in ages I had seen my parents and brother happy and enjoying themselves, so  the thoughts of suicide and running away I kept to myself. Being quite young (about 14) I wasn't very clear of what was happening in my own mind, so I just kept pushing it back. I kept changing schools, I lived with other family in Australia for a while but was still experiencing problems.

Since leaving school, my self esteem and ability to talk to people is still very low, it takes me a long time to be able to get comfortable with people and my shyness is often mistaken by people who think I don't want to socialise. I still get into depression blocks where no matter whats happening, no matter how good my life is (once I was in Paris!) I am still miserable and unable to talk to people without feeling angry or upset. The anxiety and depression I suffer is part of me, and if my schooling/bullying experiences had been different I would be in a different place, but I am who I am, I can't change I can only make it better. In the last year and a half I have changed a lot of things from my diet, social groups, environment, anything to make things better, little steps little changes make a big difference. The biggest advice I can give is to travel, after finishing school I said no to uni and jobs and decided to see the world, it was the best decision of my life, the people you meet are great, the places and cultures are amazing and in a way it takes the stress, worry out of life and makes you look at things beyond.

I think what kids these days need to learn about bullying is that yes, it will always happen, theres no stopping it. But what can be done is teaching kids to stand up for themselves, be heard and be strong. I wasn't and 7 years later I am still affected by it. The other thing is to understand why bullies act the way they do, they themselves are often in a situation of their own and bullying can be an action from that, or they are just dicks, but hey...

Moral of the story is, bullying experience can be shit, absolute fucking shit, whether its at school, work, wherever, it gets better. Take control and don't hate or blame yourself, just surround yourself with good people, and the ones who are against you, they shouldn't be worth the worry.

When I was in 5th grade I had this friends but they were guys cause were I used to live there was only guys in my street anyways this guys one day started to say chicken legs to me and I would get so mad an sad I mean I know I'm tall that's how they created me but telling "chicken legs " is not gonna work anything . Will I have a lot of problems like #1 I have been touched when I was like in 2-4 grade . #2 it happened again but this time it was my ex . #3 my mom barely told me that I have a different dad from my two lil sister and my medium brother I'm the oldest tho . #4 I move a lot my mom clean houses for 50$ only and she works for 2 days in a week . #5 sadness . #6 I feel like a nobody !): #7 I don't have  true friends ! I mean my problems I hate them I really do but someone told me that was the past dont look back just pay attention to the future you never whats gonna come . But I don't know if I should and actually I do have a best friend and that is my math teacher Mr. Miller , he said to let the horrible past to come in my mind and then everything will go away and I tried but I can't I have been in behavioral center for 6 six days and I still do the cutting in my wrist but I want to stop but I can't and I'm gonna try not to give up that's the problems DO NOT GIVE UP ! And that's exactly what I'm gonna do ! Will I'm getting help finally but I need more than that and I think with this website it is gonna help will bye !(: Ps. I'm 14 years old right now and my birthday is in April !(: Happy New Years !<3

          Love 

    Maria G. Martinez 

Hello My Name Is Brandon. im 19 but this happen to me it happend to my friend. he was sitting in class this one kid was about to go up to my friend and put his hand out to about to hit him but i stud up and looked at the kid in they eye and say walk a way or i will tell the teacher what you are doing. the kid said ok ok ill leave him alone and he just walked a way didnt bother him ever again. 

When I was really young I was bullied a lot, it wasn't by people at school thou. It was by my brothers and sisters. They called me many names and at first if just brush it off and laugh with them. But after awhile I started to believe what they would say to me. I thought I was stupid, ugly, a bad dresser, dirty, and a few others. When I was about 7 years old, I was raped by my older sister's husband's 15 year old son. Only two people know about it, one is my youngest big sister Krystal, and the other is my nephew Gabriel. When I was raped I didn't really know what was going on. All I knew was that it hurt. No one ever found out but once my youngest older brother saw my rapist making me touch him in his places. My brother didn't tell anyone, he made fun of me. He called me gay and fag, I didn't think nothing of it because I didn't know what those words meant. When I was 8 I was out into foster care, most of the homes I was put in were great. All except one. Now this home was horrible, not only because of the people but also because of the school. I was bullied relentlessly at school. And it wasn't only emotional abuse. The kids would like to hit me, they said it's because my parents didn't want me. I hated that school. The home life was another horrible place for me. The mom barely fed me and the other kids ignored me. The father raped me. By this time I knew that rape was bad, I cried and told him I would tell someone, and he hit me and threatened my life. He said he'd kill me and I wouldn't see any if my family again. He raped at least once a weak from than to about another two months, when my dad got me out of foster care. No one knows about that. I haven't told anyone because I doubt anyone would care about something that happened so long ago. Well when I started living with my dad it was great. My dad loved me and my stepmom was the sweetest woman in the world. By the time I got into 7th grade the bullying started again. People calling me ugly and gay/fag. It didn't stop till just recently when I moved to another city. (By 6th grade I knew I was gay) while I was being bullied in the 7th grade I fell into depression. I started cutting and making myself throw up, I burnt myself a lot and I shut everyone out. Apparently no one noticed my depression, no one noticed my sadness. I felt alone. Recently I got into a relationship with someone who's demons match mine (or so he says) but this boy kept me from attempting to commit suicide. He made me smile and laugh. He brought out happiness in me that I thought I lost. However recently he started to stop talking to me and he full out ignoring me. A few nights ago I was texting him and he accidentaly sent me a text that was meant for someone else It said "I fully understand that we aren't the most comfortable talking like this, our humour defense mechanism kicks in so we don't sound stupid. But let me fucking tell you before i fuck it up that I love you so much and i can only imagine myself loving you more as you love yourself more. Sorry for lengthy texts lmao fucking dork" then he said "oh f$Ck wrong person" I asked him who it was and he said it was his sister because she was sad about her exams... I knew he was lying and I can't help but think that he is cheating on me. At this thought I knew I wasn't good enough for him. I'm not good enough for anyone. I cut myself 30 times in all. 17 in my left arm and 13 on my right thigh. I don't see how my life can get any worse but I'm still here. I don't plan on leaving for anyone. If I can get through all of the stuff I've been through than I'm pretty sure you can to. I know we all feel different but your not alone. Stay strong and be happy (I just wanted to share my story with someone