Characteristics of Adult Bully Targets

Adult bullies target their victims in many of the same way children who bully do. While many people think that bullying only occurs amongst children, it can also happen in the workplace among adults. No matter what the age of a bully, they are opportunistic and tend to prey on people they perceive as a threat or that they dislike because of differences. Adult bullies almost always bully others continuously and when one target leaves, quickly pick another. The following traits are common in adult bullying victims and usually make the bully feel insecure or threatened. Adult bullying can be more of a challenge to handle because it is harder to recognize and not as widely accepted as the bullying that occurs with children.

Adult bullies target people who are good at their job and excel beyond them. Bullies want to eliminate their competition and make their work seem better than it is. While bullying is not acceptable no matter the age of the person doing it, adults will still bully others if they see it as the only way to solve their problems. Adult bullies target people who put them in danger of looking bad in an attempt to sabotage their work.

Adult bullies target people who are popular and well liked as well, especially if they are not too popular themselves. The more well liked and competent a person is, the bigger the threat they are to an adult bully. If an adult bully is seeking attention, they will target people who receive the most attention and try to make them seem less valuable.

Adult bullies target people with differences from themselves, especially those who have high morals and integrity… If a new employee refuses to join an established clique or act a certain way, adult bullies target them. If new employees do not conform or have new and independent ideas, they also may be targeted.

Adult bullies target employees who have talents, strong friendships, or who are excelling at their jobs because of jealousy and inadequacy issues. Adult bullies feel as though they have to victimize others because they are envious of their talents. Even though it would be easier to just work harder at developing their own talents, adult bullies seek to damage other people instead of working harder themselves.

Employees who have strong relationships with others may be the target of an adult bully because the bully feels left out and is angry that they are excluded. Many adult bullies have had problems forming their own friendships their entire lives. Adult bullying is often overlooked and misunderstood in the workplace. While bullying among children is more common, adult bullying does take place.

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I've always been the overweight and socially awkward kid. And being bullied is almost second nature to me, that I don't even register it anymore. I got so used to walking into a room, and hearing whispers about me, or walking down the street and having things shouted at me. I'm 21 years old now, and things are still said to me. I grew up in a society where being overweight was disgusting or repulsive, or could even be considered a disease that could be caught. At one point, it got to be so bad, that I was beaten merely because I was fat and in the wrong place at the wrong time....I was 9. Apparently my appearance and my size was everyone's business and they felt entitled to voice their opinions. Even parents of the children/teenagers that bullied me had things to say. School was a living hell for me, and if I hadn't had such a strong, nosy, caring mother, I probably wouldn't have made it through it all. So when I graduated high school, I thought it would finally be over....well I was most definitely wrong. I went to college, and it still continued there. I kept thinking to myself, when does it end? When do people realize that my appearance, my weight, my clothing, my personality, is none of their darn business. And then finally, one day, I snapped and stood up for myself. People never underestimated me or harassed me, they left me alone because they knew that hadn't broken me.

I made friends along the way, friends that didnt judge me for being socially awkward or being overweight. And they've held my hand through this whole thing. But the person I give the most credit to for all my strength, is my mother. She helped me climb out of a black hole that I never thought was possible. I talked to anyone that would listen to my story, to make people aware of what was happening. Sometimes it made things better, sometimes it made things worse. But when you hold the pain and suffering inside, it only does more damage to your soul. Dont ever be afraid to let it all out. The tears, the rage, the hurt, the pain, everything. Find ONE person you trust, and tell them everything. Even if you cant form words, just cry. Someone out there will hear you, and help you stand up for yourself. Give you the courage you never thought you had. Its okay to be vulnerable, to be afraid.

Sometimes you have to find someone that is willing to be the voice you dont have. And that's okay too. I wish someone had the courage to stand up for me when I was going through all of this. So dont suffer in silence, tell someone.

Nor does it stop when you leave out the school doors.

I'm a 25 year-old Canadian and just like the cases noted in the documentary and just like so many unheard and ignored cases around the world, I'm just another statistic that went on without response from the general society.

All through school, elementary to high school I was relentlessly picked on. The reasoning to this day has never really come clear, however like every other bully target, I have theories. The likelyhood is simply that I was a student simply not complying with the general trends of what everyone else was doing, nor was I conforming to the ideals of being "cool". When you mix that with being a very skinny kid, it might as well paint a bully target on my back.

Most of my abuse from bullies was psychological, but there was plenty of physical abuse as well. I can distinctly remember being punched out in the 5th grade simply for trying to stand up to a bully. But most of the abuse stemmed from relentless insults, constantly preventing me from being part of anything and following me to continue the abuse no matter how far or how fast I tried to run away.

But what many people refuse to admit is that it happens not only outside of school, but grown adults participate in such actions. Parents, teachers, coaches, bosses and co-workers are all guilty of being just as much of a bully, if not even more as they're in a position of higher power. One of the worst memories is when I was 14 playing on a baseball team. The coach was the father of one of the kids who relentlessly bullied me at school and during practice/games. There was even a time where I was benched for the rest of a game because I kept yelling at his son to leave me alone.

Stopping the actions of bullies isn't just limited to schools and kids. As a society we have to not only stand up to kids who bully, but adults who bully too. We cannot just stand by and allow anyone to look down upon someone and treat them like dirt under their feet.

We are all equal in this world, whether rich or poor, white or black, young or old. Let's start acting like it.

Like you have once lived in those very shoes being bullied. Years ago when I was  kid we didn't have computers as much as we do now, computers were just beginning. no social networks either so my only break was when I was home crying to my mom about being so hurt by words. I was teased because my nose looked like a "witches" nose or always known as roman nose. Not fun. I had medical issues and problems walking without twisting my foot as I walked falling down kids would laugh at me. Gym class I hated running because my feet didn't go straight up and down rather side ways everyone laughed then too. My list is endless. I survived those days even when I felt hopeless and worthless too. Over time I have learned I am strong inside and have come farther then I had back then. Some people still don't want to see things I do, but I know I work hard. Now I have a group on face book inspired by my children who too face bullying challenges as I once did too. I want them to know they aren't alone, Mom has survived her time and reaches out to others now too.  Every step is hard but can move forward and move ahead.

It'll be 4 years ago in October that one of my friends commited suicide. My friends at my karate studio and I didn't know what to do. The saddest part about it is that I had no idea. My friend commited suicide on a Friday night and I got a call on Saturday from my instructor telling me he had died. My entire studio came together that Monday night and instead of class we had a little memorial for him. We all sat around a ring in the studio and retold stories and cried for our fallen commrade, but we also came to an understanding that we could no longer just sit around and let bullying just happen. So we started an award in honor of our friend Tyler. Yes, the Tyler in Bully. We have the Tyler Long Award and I was lucky enough to get the 2nd annual Tyler Long Award and with it came the responsability of protecting everyone in the studio from getting bullied and if anybody had a problem they came to me for the year I had it. During that time I came closer to God and grew to understand that when Tyler died he started a movement for the rest of the world to stop bullying and I have to tell the world that it does get better, when school ends those bullies that bullied you will be long gone and you'll find new friends and that life will go on after high school. Everyone will get bullied in there life time but people grow up, realise thier mistakes, and will ask for forgiveness. I promise you that they will one day whether that be to your face or to God they will apologize. Ijust want everyone to know out there that it gets better and that commiting suicide isn't the answer. If you need someone I'm here to talk as well as everyone else on this site. Stay strong and carry on because it gets better!

   When I was in elementary and middle school I was not very "cool." I used to get picked on a lot because I was always very small. I did not have any friends and I would always walk around with my head down. Once I got to high school after all those years of being picked on I started to do parkour. I was already really good at acrobatics so parkour just came naturally to me.  I eventually found a small gym here in DC to learn more about parkour and practice it. The people that I've met through parkour have help me to come out and express myself more. Now I have tons of friends from all over the world and I am an American Parkour Sponsored Athlete. Anybody can get through bullying all you need is people that are willing to help you and I am one of those people. LETS STOP BULLYING!!!!!

My best friend is a lesbian and she is a little bit overweight. I think she is gorgeous and accept her just the way she is. However, it breaks my heart to have to see her go through the bullying she gets at school. I defend her when I can, but I'm not always around. People call her fat and ugly and make fun of her for being a lesbian. It makes me sick to my stomach. I hope some day we can put a stop to bullying once and for all.

I never got bullied that bad at school. I was shy and kind of hung back in the shadows. However when I got my first real job at Steak N' Shake I got bullied every day I came to work. People called me a f*** up and told me I could never do anything right and was ugly. They called me a lesbian even though I wasn't because I have short hair. If anyone messed up something they would gang up and blame it on  me even if I had nothing to do with it. I was constantly put down and bullied every day. The managers even joined in. I felt worthless. Bullying isn't just at school. It's everywhere. Every time I have to pass Steak N' Shake I cry. I was also sexually harassed there. I eventually got let go because they did not have the hours to give me anymore, but the scars still remain. And always will.

All throughout middle school and elementary I would be bullied for being, as the bullies would say, "ugly, disgusting, a loser, an outcast, a person no one liked, etc". That would be everyday at school. I never told anybody because I felt weak and was embarrassed that I was the one who got bullied.

As if that wasn't enough, people found out I was bisexual. I've always known I wasn't normal or straight. I've always liked both boys and girls. But one day, it finally leaked out and I didn't deny it, because I thought it was fine and this well known girl did it too. I was so wrong.

This girl started it all. She had spread rumors of me liking several girls and how me being a bisexual was socially horrific. She bullied me everyday in school, out of school, online, and through texts and calls. I became so depressed and thought of suicide daily. I cut myself and once tried to kill myself by taking pills and going to sleep, I woke up the next day completely fine. No one knew I did tho. I was really good at keeping my feelings and everything that was happening inside me and hidden.

But one day I stood up for myself when no one ever did and I was sick of it. I stood up for me being bisexual, for me not being normal, for every other person who was being bullied for not being straight. I was done, I had to stop it. So I did.

I got into a big fight with the girl, we didn't get physical tho. But needless to say, I don;t get bullied anymore. I helped myself, and now I help others when I see someone getting bullied. Sometimes it just takes one person to take a stand and sometimes it just takes YOU. Stand up for something, or you'll fall for everything. Things get better.

STOP BULLYING, AND TAKE A STAND FOR EQUALITY.

When I was 10 years old I was being bullied by one of the boys in my class who was always calling me "Gay" and saying hurtful things about me that made the other children laugh. I suffer from ADHD and Anxiety and was a bit of a tomboy so I was a little on the socially awkward side. I reported the bullying to my mother and to my 5th Grade teacher, and the school took action right away and nipped the bullying in the bud. 

Throughout school I'd occasionally bullying again from time to time, but whenever I reported it to the teacher or the school counselor the school always took action. Other people who dealt with bullying at our schools had similar things happen. 

By the time that we were in High School it was clear to EVERY student that bullying was NEVER okay. Our High School didn't really have any bullying. Yeah, students got into fights and said mean things, but the school always nipped it in the bud so quickly that nothing else really came about it. I'm proud to say I went to our school district. Our school district is proof that if you take the appropriate action you CAN make a difference!