i was beautiful when I was younger until my own dad started telling me I needed to lose weight and I thought "am I getting fat?" I didn't pay much attention to it and then when he walked out of my life it became worse. a few weeks before it, I was raped , I was only 8. Him leaving became a big impact on my life that I decided I don't care how I look that's when the bully started , I would go home and cry and ask God " why me?" I started cutting my wrist, not to deep but it showed. I was only in 4th grade.. then 5th grade came and the bullying continued. That year my cousin passed away from a drunk driver and it put so much hurt on me and I got braces and glasses , they had new things to pick on me for. My cousin was a lesbian so they said she was a freak and they called me "traintracks" they would say " you're fat , looks like you ate the whole meal" so much that's when my eating disorder started along with cutting so I grew sick . 6th grade was probably when I hit rock bottom. I cut deep, I didn't eat at all but I still threw up whatever I could even if It was nothing and I tried to commit suicide more than 5 times. 7th grade though, that's when I took a stand for myself and the harming calmed down, so did the bullying but it didn't stop. Im now 15 years old and going to be a sophomore in High School and my boyfriend and the little circle I have of friends help me to be self harm free and remind me that im perfect the way I am, so I've been 2 months clean and the bullying no longer happens although the past still haunts me because I still remember the pain, Im still terrified and everything but im learning how to become strong because I got this far /.\